Today, I received a letter from one of the participants in Stephens's summer course. Like me, she's had lessons for a couple of years, without intending to do teacher training. She suggested to keep in touch to exchange experiences. It's been ages since I received a letter, I hope I manage to write back regularly. Still, it's nice to know someone with similar questions and doubts.

What struck me in Stephen is that he's able to do both- both the "blink your eye and you're up in the sky" kind of AT and the very practical, physically oriented step-by-step kind of AT. He's also good in explaining both pros and cons of both kinds; the magic that people experience in the first is hard to obtain by yourself. On the other hand, the physical approach of the second brings with it the risk that you forget about directions altogether.

His own way of teaching is very gentle. Sometimes I'd just be sitting on the chair, waiting for some kind of pulse or impulse from him, without even noticing that he'd been doing so for a couple of seconds already :-)I think I'm more used to really being -taken- out of chair while I focus on my directions, rather than actively moving myself. Which of course is not completely true, but I guess that's where I meet the limits of trying to write about sensory experiences.

One of the real challenges that I encountered during Stephen's lessons is working on myself. I've never really tried this, except for some lying down on the floor in order to re-align everything. But here, it's all about sitting, standing up, walking around while you inhibit, direct and consent. I'm amazed at how hard it is to keep my attention focused even for just a few seconds. The first day, I end up with a back that you could use as an iron-board, and during the rest of the week, it only gets slightly better. Trying to do something, and trying it too hard...I should know better, shouldn't I?

Some of Stephen's students also attend his classes in this week, and although they look very calm and composed to me, I also note that some of them move extremely grave and careful, almost like they are afraid of moving any faster. I realise that slow movements allow you to check yourself now and then, but a bit more spirit, a bit more life...where's the sparkle? Where's the smile? Then again, how would I feel when I had to give this stuff to other people. Nervous, I think.

Something that did put a smile on my face were the whispered 'ah's. I tried some while standing, and after overcoming some embarrassment, I really enjoyed doing them. After a few minutes, I even managed to release some of the tension around my diaphragm, which resulted in a kind of natural vibrato, effortless, sustainable and fun!

Yael is another of MacDonald's pupils, and it shows. She' much more quiet than Giora, very slow, graceful movements and speech. Her sense of humor is incredibly dry: "now, while you are walking around the room, you might try breathing- it may come in handy". She makes me experience a lightness in moving, especially in walking. Hope to see her again someday.

On monday morning, I meet Giora Pinkas. He's stayed on for a while after the congres and leaves for California today. Stephen has invited him to his class. Our meeting went like this (me sitting on a chair, waiting for Stephen):

GP: "What time did this lesson start?"
Me: "About five minutes ago"
GP: "Are you paying for this?"
Me: "Yes, I am."
GP: "Let's get started then!"

GP's is one big feast of recognition: it's great to finally have a proper lesson after 8 months of, well, coping. His movements are incredibly rapid; within seconds he has me sitting, standing, in monkey and flying back again. Quite an experience! While I try to keep track, I note that he pulls my chin forward much more than I'm used to, really pulling, rather than letting it happen as a result of a direction. But apart from that, I'm just stunned by the effortless movements that I'm able to make all of a sudden.

Giora talks a lot during teaching, sometimes in English, sometimes in Jiddisch. I didn't get a lot of it, because I was flying all over the place, but one saying remained: "inhibition is just another word for 'whatever'".

I started taking lessons in Alexander Technique in August 2001. That summer, I spent a wonderful holiday singing in a small chapel in Spain, with great people and a good singing teacher. During one of the lessons, he very subtly remarked that my neck was as stiff as a concrete stake- and thank you very much...

It was then that one of my singing companions mentioned that I might like to get to know about Alexander Technique. He himself had some lessons and said it had improved his posture a lot.

Back home, I decided to follow up on this, and to my surprise, I found an Alexander teacher just a bike ride from home. I sent him an e-mail, and he invited me over for an introduction into the FM Alexander Technique.

Today, things have changed. Or rather, I have changed- considerably. And I've got lots of things that I want to remember. I tried writing them down in a small, battered notebook, but I write so much slower than I type.

Besides, when I searched for other people's experiences with Alexander Technique, I couldn't find very much. Of course, there are loads of AT teachers who have written down their stories, but those are different stories altogether. Heck, they even have their own conference!

That's why I decided to start this weblog: partly as my own notebook, where I can keep jottings, thoughts and memories, and partly as something I might like to share with others.

Note: I started this weblog in september 2004; but since my log allows backposting, I've put entries in chronological order.

For those of you who get confused (and mainly for myself), here's a timeline of my AT adventures:

• August 2001 - Start AT lessons with teacher 1, aka D.


• September 2003 - First Chi Gong lessons.


• November 2003 - D. stops teaching.


• February 2004 - I stop Chi Gong lessons, because I find it hard to adjust to Eastern philosophy and ways of teaching.


• March 2004 - Start AT lessons with teacher 2, aka mr. other teacher. After five lessons, I decide that this is not what I'm looking for.


• July 2004 - Re-start Chi Gong lessons. This time, I manage to make the required leap of faith, and a wonderful journey begins.


• September 2004 - Summer AT workshop in Oxford, with Stephen Cooper, Yael Tam and Giora Pinkas.


• October 2004 - Start AT lessons with teacher 3, aka J. Although lessons help me a lot, it's not what I'm searching for, so in August 2005, I stop.


• April 2005 - AT workshop in Engelberg, with Ruth Gysin, Giora Pinkas, Yehuda Kupermann, Meir Amit.


• July 2005 - Re-start AT lessons with D.